The other day Wendy and I took the pre-runner out for a little rip.

It’s so much fun for me to explore around the desert and mountains of Southern Utah.
We truly live in an amazing part of the country.
The headphones that we were wearing allowed us to talk to each other while we are driving around.

We talked about what we were seeing.
What we were experiencing.
I would ask her if she was comfortable.
We visited about life.
Our kids.
Little too fast, slow it down. Ha, that never happens.

It’s a game changer for sure to have open communication while experiencing a drive like this out in the desert and mountains.
A ride like this can easily turn into several hours and 50-70 miles covered.

Communication is key to a successful ride together out in the UTV playing around, not to mention when we raced.
Just like the many variables we experienced riding around together in the desert and mountains. Back home has its variables also. And a whole lot more.


Communication is key to the success we experience in our marriage together day to day.
All areas of our marriage.

  • With each other.
  • Our kids.
  • Our home.
  • Personally and professionally.
  • Our finances.

We work hard at this.
Yes, it takes work. Deliberate, focused attention and energy in this area.
Just like anything worthwhile in life.
The more we put into it the more we get out of it. 

How often do you and your spouse communicate strategically about your finances? Goals? Targets? Income and expenses? Balance sheets?

If you want to be successful in this area, it’s no different than all the other areas of your life.
It requires open communication.

Is riding in the pre runner one of Wendy’s favorite things to do? No.
But she knows how much I enjoy it.
It’s a passion of mine.

One thing that has worked well in our communication is what’s called 5 and 3.
It’s an exercise in being heard and present.
“I hear you” is so powerful in a strong bonded marriage.

Here is how it works:

  1. Set a timer for 5 min.
    • In this 5 min one spouse talks and the other one listens.
  2. At the end of 5 min set the timer for 3 min.
    • During the 3 min the one talking listens to the other share what they heard you say during the 5 min.

Men, no solving. What a relief right? No solving. No fixing. Just repeat back the best you can over 3 min what you heard them say.
I’m serious about no fixing. It’s tempting for sure. Don’t do it. JUST Listen. It’s an exercise in being heard.

Then switch.

  • The other one talks for 5 min and the other listens. Then 3 min of what they heard you say.

What do you share? Whatever you want to share.
Talk about whatever you want.

  • Kids.
  • Personal. Professional.
  • Finances.
  • Health.
  • Dreams.
  • Trips.
  • Concerns.
  • Opportunities.
  • Gratitude.
  • Family.
  • Yourself.
  • Faith.

The list goes on and on.

Yes, talk about money. There is a lot of emotion around money. Talk about it. Stay open. Express concerns. Goals. Wants. Desires.
Money plays a major role in our lives. In order for us to stay in abundance with our money life, we must talk about it. We must track it to control it.

You may not have learned this growing up. I was never taught this. We had to learn it. And with anything good and worthwhile in our lives it takes practice.


Have fun with it. Be constructive. Stay open.

It’s a practice that takes practice.

How do you get good at it? Start. Reps. Just like anything else worthwhile in life.

You deserve to have this in your life.

It works when you work it.

Test it to know for yourself.